Are u ready for this?

Name: Stanley Ho Tean Yang School: Clementi Town Primary school(97-00), Clementi Primary School(01-02), Queensway Secondary School(03-07), Serangoon Junior College(08-09) Just another normal guy out there with some amibitions. Chemistry is his all time favourite subject. Shy at the start but is sincere in making friends after some time. Well, check out my entries to know more =) Facebook:http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=3514077&id=546647135&fbid=190227737135#/profile.php?ref=profile&id=766702584

The feeling that was kept in me for years, the reserve Stan who keep everything to himself, the insane Stan who endured for 18 years finally succumbed! I can't take it anymore...

I seemed to be keeping away from ppl for many years without a specific reason. However, I know the dominant reason and i really do. I can't possibly describe here but what i can say is due to my childhood. Perhaps i had a pathetic childhood when i was young. Its very sad to say that but it really happened to me. =(

Till now, i still persist on that reserve and self centered attitude of mine. Never will it vanish unless miracle happens. Everything is just bad, sucky, demoralising, hurting and harsh to me. Seriously, i cant take it anymore.

The second time i am fallingofffromtheedge again.. I took some time to climb back but, I just couldn't station at that point. Every single obstacle just came and pushed me off the edge again and again.. I will never and ever be on the top..

I hate the moment when i receive that single set of paper. It just gave me an indication that i SUCK, I am STUPID, I CAN'T do it, I am NOT suitable for this course, I have NO knowledge AT ALL!! Probably, i am wrong. But i am not when u see that single digit out of --

Having said all that, I have this very bad habit that I always think a lot. I always always have that in my mind. Sounds pessimist? Yup, i agree.. But that is me and i hard to scrap off.. Sigh, what can i do, i cannot endure anymore..

Year 2008 is really an obstacle to me, how will i face it? I dunno.. There is more to come i suppose! I remember this from Mrs Dhaliwal" At the end of this, what have u gotten for yourself?" I seriously can't picture it out.. I am already suffering like a mad cow who went mad at home always.

On top of that, i saw my peers' blog. I mean i really can't help much due to the time constrain of mine, but its quite sad to see each and everyone of them suffering from one way or another.. I am sorry pals i am not helping when u all are having a bad time out there BUT i will if i can find some time! People, i will be waiting for 17 June!

No matter how strong one is, no matter how a person poses a high level of endurane, one will definitely have obstacles or problems.. Thats the reason y i have a blog to surface out my deep emotions..

Sorry for the EMO blog entry today, cos i am really temperamental today. Restless all the time etc.. I will revive real soon..

I will blog the happenings on Marcus's bday next time.. People i hope u take care, dun be like someone named Stanley Ho Tean Yang..

Labels: The Emo Stanley

Hello, before i begin, let me show u 2 pictures..





Marcus and Kenny present a chaotic scene.. Haha.. Always so fun!

A trip to STARBUCKS on friday! NICE LA!!

Went to my cousin house as we planned to go for Yong Tau Hu by her friend at CHinatown.. Always so nice! While eating, there is this girl 21 appoach both of us. She is selling a brand named(Cant remember) which manufactured by CK perfume.. Initially it was potent, so it puked me.. I heard it is $19.90 for 1 bottle, so i think forget it, a bit ex. But in the end my cousin told me it was $19.90 for 2! I was like, OH, its so cheap.. And evetually it smell good after it has diffused.. OMG, rush to the girl... Cos i can keep it and give it to my friend whose Bday is coming or use it.. Its nice! But sad to say, the girl was no where to be found! =( I am fated!

Next, met up with my cousin.. At the hawker centre, uncle gave me $50 to pay for the Hokkien Mee which will take quite a while to come. He went to queue for famous ROJAK.. So i was left with my cousin and her mum.. Her mum bought CHEE KUAY! ANd yup, i was happily eating and reading my CHEMICAL BONDING NOTES! Hmm, this careless cousin dripped a drop of oil onto my paper.. Immediately, i search for tissue paper and wipe it off with BOTH HANDS(as claim).. Yeah, Rojak is here, lets eat.. Talk about Chelsea and Man Utd etc, POLY and JC life.. Yeah, Hokkien Mee is here.. "At that moment, i had a very bad feeling" It just appear through my mind suddenly.. That is when i found out that the $50 note is nowhere to be found..

I search up and down, left and right, pour out everything in my bag, there is nowhere to be found.. I was lectured by my uncle, and i kept quiet without arguing back to him.. =( I mean I just cant believe it that the $50 just flew IN MY HANDS! How careless I m.. Do u wanna know how it is gone? Read there previous 2 para..

Sigh, WHY ON EARTH WILL STAN BE SO CARELESS AGAIN! The 2nd issue that made my life so damn miserable bcos of "CARELESSNESS!" The last time i lost an important stuff is my wallet and that is like 8 years ago? When i m in P4.. Which means i really do take care my belongings.. Why will i loose it? I just dunno y.. Perhaps i am still not careful enough! STAN DO SOMETHING!!

Draw out $50 from ATM and pay back his losses.. I could see that he is in a dfficult position on whether or not to accept it due to the fact that i wasn't working plus i am his close nephew.. However, he instructed me to pay for the expenses for POOL and TAXI FARE!

Erm, while playing, i just can't focus on playing.. Is either is miss the hole or the white ball went in as well.. Restless throughout and no mood at all... (I just can't get over it)

To some ppl, you might think that $50 is just a small proportion of total income and can easily earn back. However to me, its quite a lot.. I can buy like a pair of shoe, some clothings etc.. And GSS is coming and i wasted this money due to carelessness.. Sigh.. STUPID STAN! And ppl, its not the money that matters, i think to me it matters most is character and attitude towards your belongings.

Stuff the remaining amount of money into his bag without his notice.. Hmm, i feel much better after that, cos he refuse to accept the money despite me constantly giving him..

Oh gosh, this is one of the WORSE SATURDAY! Cant get the perfume i like, LOST $50 and nearly lost my shoe.. What the hell is going on with my life? Luck is really not at my side.. ="(

Went for PW meeting 8am in the morning at airport..

Terminal 2

When will I have the chance to go overseas? I miss taking a plane!(Dad"If u can go JC2, i will sponsor u to Hong Kong) YEAH! my dream!

Simon, if u r viewing this, just wanna tell u i thought of u once is was there.. I really do miss ur existence in Singapore.. I will wait for u to be back in Nov/ Dec ok? Hope u r doing well in Melbourne! =) See ya real soon! Take care dude!

Erm, let me tell u, ppl u should go T3, its so nice with lots of shopping to do.. Foodcourt etc it really look like Vivocity! Enjoyed walking with Mojojolene and Yoke Hung!

After which, went Tiong Baru Plaza for lunch with Yoke Hung, ate my favourite food at KOPITIAM!

Do u know where is this? Its 1 of my favourite place to wait and sit down there slacking etc.. Haha.. However, it has turn to a cold, empty and annonymous place.. The feeling wasn't the same anymore!

Sigh, Fate! I guess i have to get over it asap and carry on with life. Can u all pity me pls! This week is really bad for me.. What to do? Anyway, gtg, take care and see ya real soon.. I will be back!

Labels: Unlucky unlucky and unlucky

It's fascinating.
It's a miracle.
It's unbelieveable
It's astounding

Let me ask u a question, have u come across something that you have lost appear again?
Yes/No?

To me, out of astonishment, MY FILA SHOE WAS BACK!

I was pretty devastated the last 2 days and i miss my shoe, having worn only 2 months.. I finally get to feel and hold my shoe. No words could describe how i felt at that moment.. Perhaps just PURE ELATION!

I can't believe it, it actually lie in my school locker for 2 days without any notice.. However, that is not my locker, its my friend Kenneth's locker.. And he had no idea how my shoe landed in his locker.. I shall not pursue, so long as my shoe is found, i am more than happy to share this happiness to u.. Hehe..

And i made a mistake, i am actually NOT very careless in the train. In other words, i didn't lose my shoe in the train.. Haha.. Ok..

Anyway, had Kobayashi today and Starbucks.. Had a nice day today.. Really.. I got to see the real things happening in society.. Finally got to see people walking on the street of the busy town on Friday night.. =)

Siigh, but dun u think that sometimes life isn't that of what u think? U see it as a challenge or whatever, it turn out to be a period of time when one has to suffer hardship etc? Or should i say that things are changing simultaneously that causes the dominant factor to vary too? Sigh, I just get to see that even if u r trying as hard as u could or expecting a better outcome, it turn out to be an oppostie way.. SO how shall i put it?

Labels: Ceteris Paribus

Went to Orchard with Marcus, Yoke Hung and Kenneth as Marcus wanted to repair his laptop. So might as well join him as there is NO CCA today!

Regrettably, during my trip to Orchard, I LOST MY SHOE BAG. I found out ONLY after Marcus is done with his LAPTOP! I was like THATS IT! I felt terrible and became a paranoid after that. Thinking how and the various ways to get back that shoe..

That FILA shoe does not really cost a lot but however i wear for only 2 months and its gone.. I mean how careless i am to lose this shoe= VERY HARD! I take care of my belongings. However i lost to carelessness.. SIGH! I left it on the floor of the train that i took to Dougby Ghaut. Fated

Right now i still can't accept that fact.. I WILL CALL SBS TRANSIT tmr to see whether the operating workers in NEL got to see that and keep it for me.

WHat else can i do if they say NO?

Labels: I hope so

3 days of break- gone!

I am looking for more. I have already know where i wanna head in future.
I have enough, but i want more and i know its pouring me
I just wanna see the outcome.
I love it to the CORE

Covering up isn't a good thing
But u will love it when u can talk to urself alone
Will that be a habit from then
It all depends on individual

Ok, sorry for this craps, just feel like writing something.. SIGH, tmr is another suffering day! When can i get myself an MC?

Labels: Hope so

Back from Maths lesson.. I need lots of revision in that chapter, FUNCTION... Seemed a bit tough.. Anyway, last Sunday was my first meeting for PW.. Reach Starbucks City Hall at 8am(and someone came at 8.30am) =X.. However its nice to be there for discussion, the ambience is good..

NICE ONE! So ARTISTIC..


Not sure what effect is this.. Blur? Hehe..



BLACK AND WHITE!

My group leader and I.. Thanks A LOT CHERYL! U r a good leader! We will work hard!

Different kinds of funny faces.. I think is infra red image.. Haha..

Oh no, we have gone back to old times.. Sepia image



AHHAHAHAHA.. Stan has become a ugly rounded head monster.. Oh!



HAHAHAHA.. I love this picture the most.. Just can't stop laughing! WE have a BIG head!

Oops, what are we up to next? Can u see my KING KONG GORILLA face... Small head! Haha.. They are so shock and look at their faces, "eeeeeeee"..

OH NO, our heads are all subducted into mid air.. Look at my head, twisted!

Haha.. SUPER SMALL HEAD with a BIG BODY! Cheryl's hair is sucked my my head, Oh Yoke Hung r u a monster? =X Funny ah Jolene! KING KONG face.

Haha.. Have u enjoy urself? I thought that was funny so just post something here.. Haha.. Went AJISEN RAMEN at Hougang Mall with Yong Xin, Kenny, Hui Ying and Yoke Hung on tuesday!

Had this student meal. $9.30 includes a standard Ramen, chioce of side dish and a drink.. Not too bad!



Next up, the peeps who didn't sleep for the whole night just to do Project Work! Poor thing... Taken during first period on Thursday PW lesson..

To end off my post, finally got this photo from my SL.. A promise is always a promise.. Haha.. Yup, showcasing the 4 Horn players during SR musical.. [Mr Jonathan Lee(guest player cum teacher), Yan Ling(SL), Pei Li and ME] I like this photo a lot =) Ok stop here, People, study hard, although June break is approaching..

Labels: Events

As promised if u have read my blog, i promise to post the pictures of my Dad's Birthday.. Haha.. I have gotten them.. Enjoy!

Went Ah Yat Abalone Restaurant for dinner.. Haha.. Nice meal but its kinda full on that day.. Grrhh, super bloated...
A birthday cake for u DAD.. Happy Birthday( oops Happy BELATED Birthday).. I like to celebrate at home where u can sense the warmth under the ceiling.

NEXT

Last Friday was my Mum's Birthday, so celebrated as usual.. After a meal outside, we will sing a song at home.. Went YET CON restaurant, which is a Hainannese Restaurant.. Food was nice But the environment SUCKS! Dilapidated.. Ok, photo time..

What a poor picture taken.. =( I dun think it's artistic to focus on the side.. Hehehehe..

Home at 10pm.. Again sing birthday song and cut cake.. Nice =)

WISH AND WISH AND WISh WIsh Wish wish ............

Labels: I love my parents

Life is all about adventure, playing, sleeping, studying, hanging out, working etc? Or is there a cost to pay before what it takes today? Or is there a repercussion before u are one? I dun know, i seriously dunno.

I receive an sms yesterday and had beem seeing repetitive encouraging words.. However, i seriously dun think that is the case.. Seeing all those Top students in other JC and even my classmates, they are doing far much better than me. I am one who is stupid, slow, always take short cut, covering up whatever need not be done etc.. I really dunno..

Having said that, i know i have to overcome that. No matter how bad u r, u will have to do it. Its the most essential part that u need to clear that obstacle. No matter how bad u did, u have to face it and learn from it.

And with those time consuming subjects, i seriously dunno what to do. Sitting at the lecture theatre to slack? I wasn't, but things just couldn't get into my mind. I really dunno..

Have been covering up lots for this week.. What shall i do next.. I just want some time for myself to take a breath.. I fell terribly..

Labels: Off The Edge

Early in the morning, i was at TRCC last Saturday for our big day! SR musical! I was the performer for Band.. Yeah, love my French Horn.. I really enjoyed that day.. Its so fun!



Let's take a picture of my section.. Haha.. Left out 1 guy... He is Mr Lee a trainee teacher who played French Horn too.. Hope i can get the pic of the 4 of us ASAP! Yup, taken b4 the concert!



After the first performance.. Left our instruments at the back stage! =) Nice right?



Thank you Sista Shar, Ming, Kenny and Willy Walla for your time to come and watch my school's musical.. Although it's quite related to my school's stuff, but i thik u all have enjoyed the musical right? Haha.. Anyway, THANK YOU so much.. Shall See ya soon! =)

Lastly, after such a long 3 days of performing and rehearsals, it finally came to an end! But i do really enjoy it! Let's take a picture of 1S30 who are in the musical! Cheese!

Labels: I Will Remember

Before Prelims.. Had a great day! =) Hey yo, 6 of June! Is that ok?

TCC, slack around! Love to slack =)

Kat, thanks for the cupcakes! =) Thats very thoughtful of u.. Thanks!

I believe all of us(Mr Fahmi's batch) will miss those days!

What is this? Illegal gathering is it? Haha nope, 513 slacking time(Remedial lesson)

The bunch of 'monkies'.. Naughty but smart monkies.. =) All e best!

Not forgetting one of my favourite leisure place..

PROM NIGHT 2007! I miss those days!




1st December 2005! OMG! I look like a ----! =(






First piad concert! Ah Mei Concert! I will never forget! *Enjoyed* Thanks Rups!




My brain is functioning all the time. However i just think that I am still using my Secondary self to treat my JC work.. I shouldn't have done that BUT I just dunno y.. I wanted to try very hard but i could not.. Everytime i see these pictures, everything will be back to square 1... I wish i could take away.......

Labels: Soon

Rups Kenny Sharon Kat Jasmine Simon Yi Pei Willy Walla Luanne Brian Wai Kin Li Juan Nigel(Bro) Kelvin Lee Cherry Yongxin Hui Ying Joycelyn How Leong Jolene Si Hui Cheryl
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